With work, errands, and endless social media scrolling, quality time with your partner can easily slip through the cracks. A study by the National Marriage Project paints a concerning picture: 52% of couples rarely or never have dedicated date nights. On the other hand, 48% of couples arrange date nights regularly (at least once or twice a month).
The good news? According to this study, frequent date nights are associated with marital happiness. A whopping 83% of wives and 84% of husbands who prioritize regular date nights report being “very happy” in their marriages.
So, where do you find time to prioritize your relationship amid life’s chaos? You might be surprised by the answer: Your Calendar. Of course, your primary relationship needs great care, but remember, all relationships take work, and an easy way to do that work is to schedule “relationship todo’s” on your Calendar.
Planning date nights might not seem particularly romantic, especially when Valentine’s Day pressure is thick in the air. Despite this, it’s a surprisingly effective way to create intentional intimacy and prioritize connection.
With your calendar in hand, let’s make your perfect date night a reality.
1. Recognize the importance of date nights.
Date nights go beyond dinner and movies. It’s all about nurturing your relationship and creating memories together. According to research, couples who spend time together regularly report higher levels of satisfaction and intimacy.
Ultimately, by prioritizing date nights in your life, you commit to prioritizing your relationship no matter what.
2. Choose the right tool.
A calendar is essential for planning effectively. However, in this case, you want a calendar that works for both of you. Whatever the calendar, be sure it can be accessed and updated by both of you. Any calendar will do, whether it’s a digital one like Calendar or Google Calendar or a physical (analog calendar) one like a planner.
However, you’ll want to remember that digital calendars usually come with reminders and can be accessed from anywhere. As a result, staying on track becomes easier.
3. Set a regular schedule.
When it comes to date night, you need consistency. Decide whether you want date nights once a week, twice a week, or once a month. You should pick a time and date that is convenient for you and your partner after you’ve settled on a frequency.
For example, “every Friday at 7 PM” or “the first Saturday of the month.” Most importantly, treat this time as sacred, like a work meeting or medical appointment.
4. Brainstorm date ideas together.
Date nights should be planned in collaboration with your partner. To start, put together a list of activities you both enjoy with your partner. Ideally, try a mix of low-key and adventurous options, such as:
- Trying out a new restaurant for dinner.
- Making a home-cooked meal together.
- A hike along a local trail.
- Attending a live sporting or music event.
- Learning a new hobby like pottery or dance.
When the time comes, having a list ready makes choosing an activity easier.
5. Theme your dates.
You can make your date nights more exciting and memorable by adding themes. A few examples are;
- Cultural night. Discover a new cuisine or watch a film in a foreign language.
- Throwback night. Return to where you first met, or revisit a place that holds meaning.
- Game night. Challenge each other to board or video games.
- Seasonal fun. In summer, picnic on the beach or go apple picking in the fall.
Overall, adding themes keeps things fresh and adds an element of surprise.
6. Budget wisely.
There’s no need to break the bank on date nights. Be upfront about your budget and plan accordingly. Picnics in parks, stargazing, or DIY spa nights are all free or low-cost options that can be just as memorable as a fancy dinner.
Remember, the goal is to spend quality time together, not spend a small fortune.
7. Prepare in advance.
Once you’ve chosen your date activity and budget, take a few minutes to prepare. For instance,
- Don’t forget to make a reservation if you’re dining out.
- Ensure you have all the supplies you’ll need if you stay home.
- Early booking is recommended if you are reserving tickets for your date.
When everything is prepared, stress can be reduced, and everything runs smoothly.
8. Set boundaries around date night.
It is crucial to set boundaries during your time together so that you can make the most of it. As such, don’t check your phone, turn off work notifications, and let your friends and family know you won’t be available. When you’re fully present, you show your partner that they have your undivided attention.
9. Be flexible.
Life happens. When you need to reschedule your date night because of an emergency, don’t panic. Find a convenient time to reconnect with your partner.
No matter what, date nights must remain a priority, even if they sometimes need to be rescheduled.
10. Reflect and adjust.
Every time you go on a date, take some time to reflect. What did you enjoy most? Is there anything that could be improved? You can refine your plans and feel valued and fulfilled by regularly discussing these experiences.
Date Night Inspiration for Every Season
Valentine’s Day isn’t the only time to schedule date nights. For some seasonal date night ideas, here are some suggestions;
Spring
- Shop at a local farmer’s market and prepare a meal using fresh ingredients.
- Wander through a botanical garden.
- At a nearby park, fly kites.
Summer
- Spend the day at the beach with a sunset bonfire.
- Try kayaking or paddleboarding.
- Enjoy a movie outdoors.
Fall
- Find your way through a corn maze or go pumpkin picking.
- Organize a cozy movie marathon with hot cider and blankets.
- Enjoy the autumn foliage by taking a scenic drive.
Winter
- Together, build a gingerbread house.
- You can ice skate or sledding.
- Make hot chocolate at home and have a tasting night.
Final Thoughts
Even though planning a perfect date night with your calendar might not seem natural, it’s a great way to maintain your relationship. With intentional time spent together, you build a relationship based on love, trust, and connection.
FAQs
How can my calendar help me plan a date night?
- Scheduling. A calendar is the cornerstone of your planning. With it, you and your partner can easily find convenient times for both of you.
- Reminders. Whenever you have an important date or reservation coming up, you can set a reminder.
- Brainstorming. You can jot down ideas for dates, locations, and even possible activities in your calendar.
- Budgeting. Keep track of your date night expenses and stay within your budget by integrating your budget with your calendar.
- Coordination. Your calendar can help keep everyone informed when coordinating with a babysitter or making reservations.
What are some good date night ideas?
- Consider your interests. What are your favorite things to do together? Consider cooking together, attending a concert, hiking, visiting a museum, or trying out a new restaurant.
- Mix it up. Make sure you don’t get stuck in a rut! Try alternating between adventurous adventures and cozy nights at home.
- Be spontaneous. Unplanned dates can sometimes be the best. Don’t forget to leave some room for spontaneous adventures.
How can I make my date nights more special?
- Set the mood. You can create a romantic atmosphere with candles, music, and a special playlist.
- Unplug. Take a break from your phones and focus on each other.
- Communicate. Feel free to talk, laugh, and share your feelings with each other.
- Be present. Take advantage of the moment and savor the connection.
How can I use my calendar to make date nights a regular habit?
- Schedule them in advance. Schedule date nights as essential appointments and block them off on your calendar.
- Make it a priority. Don’t let date nights slip through your fingers. Make them a priority as you would any other important commitment.
- Be flexible. It’s okay to reschedule; you should find a time that works for both of you.
What are some creative date night ideas to get me started?
- Attend a local farmers market. Take advantage of fresh produce, live music, and local crafts.
- Go stargazing. Observe the night sky in a secluded spot away from city lights.
- Have a game night. Together, play board games, card games, or video games.
- Take a cooking class. Spend a day together learning a new culinary skill and enjoying the results.
- Volunteer together. Spend quality time together while giving back to your community.
Image Credit: Andrea Piacquadio; Pexels
John Hall
John Hall is the co-founder of Calendar a scheduling and time management app. He’s also a keynote speaker that you can book at http://www.johnhallspeaking.com.